TWE: Conventional Warfare

[owlcroft]

It's judges' convention time again! Only this time Mark's going along, maybe in the fond, fair hope of avoiding another incident like that of "You'd Cry, Too, If It Happened to You". Or maybe Hardcastle's too busy practicing his acceptance speech for the Blind Lady of Justice Lifetime Achievement Award to even worry about trouble.

When he and Mark show up at the hotel in Palm Springs, the party is in full swing. Judicial high-jinks abound. Hardcastle has to lay down the law to get his favorite room. "How can you have a favorite room in a hotel you've never been to before?" Mark inquires. Turns out the judge's lucky number is on the door. He's dead determined to win that achievement award and he wants every edge he can get over his chief competitor, Bucky O'Neil.

Meanwhile, the hotel manager has his hands full, having mistakenly booked both the Blind Lady's groupies and a convocation of mob families for the same weekend.

Then comes the midnight delivery of a briefcase containing cash and a high-end sniper rifle to Hardcastle's "lucky room." The mystery is slightly clarified by the inclusion of photos: mobster bosses Don Ferris and Sid Storm. Apparently a hit has been ordered.

Hardcastle attempts to work through official channels, paying a visit to the local police and trying to nail down who was supposed to have received the weapon and money. On their way to see the cops, he and Mark are forced off the road and the briefcase is stolen back by the heretofore incompetent Guns'R'Us delivery service.

With all the evidence gone the story is a hard-sell. The police have long memories and the conventioneers are famous for setting up previous faux-crimes. Milt and Mark are shown the door.

Mark thinks they've done their civic duty and now it's back to the poolside for some drinks with umbrellas! But, no, Milt's insisting on paying a visit to the intended victims. It's not that he owes Ferris for once saving his life, oh no nothing like that. It's that a murder is a murder, even when gangsters seem to be targeting each other.

Their next stop is at a local eatery where the mobsters are lunching. Ferris listens but Sid Storm gets huffy and says he'll handle his own death-threats, thank you very much. No time to order up extra body guards, the sniper rifle's already being put to good use. Shots are fired into the restaurant, giving a whole to meaning to the term "take-out order."

Well, at least the police are finally interested, what with Sid dead on the floor and all. Milt and Mark head back to their hotel, only to find Ferris and his reference librarian waiting in the lucky room. Milt's not too keen on pooling their resources but Mark has no such compunctions. He unloads everything they know and the suspect list is quickly narrowed to a hit man who winters in Tahiti.

Oddly enough, so does Bucky O'Neil. Milt and Mark continue their own research, thumbing through O'Neil's file in the convention's office. Word of this gets back to O'Neil himself. Meanwhile Hardcastle has calculated that O'Neil has had more than his share of judicial encounters with Mr. Storm and Mr. Ferris, and they've always ended in rulings favorable for the mobsters.

In the hit man's less-lucky room, an envelope has been slipped under the door. Obviously a last addition to the to-do list, it's Hardcastle's 8x11 glossy.

The banquet day has finally arrived. Bucky O'Neil is still in the running—no arrest has been made yet. Hardcastle is initially seated at a table in the back of the room but quickly escorted to the dais. His initial delight fades as he discovers he's wanted as a "presenter."

Meanwhile, Mark, still seated at the far-off table, gets a shoulder tap from one of Ferris' hoods and is escorted from the room. Ferris, operating under his own rules of evidence, had the hit man's room searched. The Hardcastle photo was discovered. Mark, now alarmed, notices movement in the projection room high up at the rear of the banquet hall. He dashes from the room and up the stairs, surprising the hit man as he's taking aim at the dais.

Mark is on the losing end of the short fight but Ferris himself steps in to shoot the hit man before he can fire on Hardcastle. O'Neil, realizing his plot has failed, flees with Hardcastle in pursuit. The chase ends in the hotel pool, O'Neil in custody.

In the epilogue, Hardcastle finally gets his award, though it's not the one he was angling for. But, hey, the mobsters probably have better food at their get-togethers and wouldn't a gavel with a built-in switchblade be really useful for cutting through red tape?

Written by: Steven L. Sears and Burt Pearl
Premiered Dec. 9, 1985

[Coyote X]

This was another wonderful episode. It even had a good epilogue! I loved the scene when they went back and forth between the speech by the judge in charge of the convention and the speech by Don Ferris. Who knew the two groups had so much in common?? Milt's relationship with Don Ferris reminded me of his relationship with Joe Cadillac - mutual dislike along with a grudging respect for each other.

There were so many guest characters over the three years that I would have loved to see in more than one episode. Don Ferris and Freddie were two of them. So were the Aunts, Teddy Hollins, Mattie Groves, and Gerald Hardcastle. Thank goodness for fanfiction!

Barbara

[Deleted]

Not to throw ants on anybody's picnic, but I always thought this ep was just average. Nothing to complain about, but nothing that really snds out for me either.

[Voyager Tip]

I really liked this episode. I thought the scene where McCormick was answering the questions about what kind of weapon it was, style, color, right or left handed grip, was entertaining. Even though Hardcastle didn't really want to cooperate with the hoods, it showed that Mark was VERY observant and had a mind of his own. I also liked the whole idea that the bad guys could identify the assassin so quickly by the type of suitcase, etc. That was a fun concept. The only thing I disliked happened at the very end. I liked it that Hardcastle got the award in the end from the hoods, but I thought it was stupid when at the end he started to read from his prepared speech. Too bad the episode ended on that note bc I didn't care for that at all. Ah well!

[owlcroft]

Before we leave this episode, I just want to add that I have mixed feelings about it. There are some wonderful bits, like McC packing for the judge and listening (yet again) to his speech. The backstory of the judge and the gangster is good, although it does kind of remind you that it was done in first season, too. The guest cast is fine. But there were problems with this one, and the most obvious is the change from the script. Maybe they thought the guys diving into an aqueduct was too risky and too expensive to shoot, but the whole scene in the quarry, or whatever that's supposed to be, is totally lacking in resolution. It doesn't make sense for them to just be let go. I wish they'd showed us the scenes in the caves with the explosion that we get a short glimpse of in the credits. That would make a lot more sense but maybe something went wrong with those scenes, too.

Overall, it's in the middle of the pack for me, which is a shame because it should have added up to more.

[Coyote X]

While I did love this episode, I think those deleted scenes would have been exciting to watch. Their omission probably led to the interminable travelogue views of Palm Springs.

Barbara